Happy Father's Day!

I know this blog is suppose to be about Emma and my boys, but it is my blog so I'll write about other things from time to time.

This morning I want to tell my Father, Happy Father's Day! I know that I have not always told you that I love you and there have been times when you have felt that I did not love you or was ashamed of you, for this I am very sorry. While things happened in the past that caused me to distance myself from you, mother and even from my siblings a bit, it was because I needed time to heal from the past scars, to find myself and to become the person I am today. There has never been a time in my life that I did not love you, only a times when I did not know how to express myself or was not self assured enough to say the words. I am not ashamed of you. You might embarrass me on occasion (this IS part of a parent's job description), but hey I'm tough enough to survive.

I regret now not spending more time with you. I vow to try and make up for this - to spend more quality time with you. I know we are two very different people, yet we have many similarities (some I'm proud of, some I say "Oh my god! I AM just like my father!).

If it were not for you introducing me to Ryan, I would probably never have realized my dream of owning horses. For this I can never thank you enough. Without my first horse Buddy, I would never have ended up with my boys....without Streak who over time has helped heal my heart and who helped me realized that some of the things that have happened in my life were not my fault, that there are just evil people out there, and that no matter how many times I fall off, that I must get up, dust myself off and get back on. Now I, also, have Nolan and Paddy to help remind me of the lessons Streak has taught. They have taught me the most valuable of all lessons....no matter how rocky the road, how hard life gets, to pause and look around there is always beauty to be found.

Thank you for always loving me no matter what. Thank you for never giving up on me. Thank you for always giving a helping hand. Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for being my father.

I love you daddy!